Where were the mean girls?

I atttened an all-school Mass today for the feast of the Immaculate Conception. Back when I had a day job, I'd go to the evening Masses for these Holy Days of Obligation--but these days I can go in the morning with the monkey, so I do.

And I'm having flashbacks. Flashbacks to plaid skirts, sitting in rows all girls and all boys, singing along to the guitar music. And the music hasn't changed--the standard "children's Mass" hymns are still alive and kicking.

Today I sat behind the 8th grade girls. 8th grade was Hell. The social pressures were almost too much for me to bear. Why you ask? Well, for starters I was the tallest person in the 8th grade. So that means I was tallest person in the entire school. I thought I was fat, hated my glasses, hated my clothes, so on and so forth. And then there were the MEAN GIRLS (Carol, Christie and Michelle A., if you must know). So I had 4 friends, all equally pathetic as I was, and we made the year bearable for each other.

So I sat there today, wondering who the mean girls were. I couldn't tell. They all looked happy and friendly, which, you know, is the sign of a slick mean girl. ALL the girls were wearing clunky gym shoes and low-cut socks. Most of them were wearing school sweatshirts, but with different emblems. When you wear a plaid skirt to school everyday, accessories become important. Socks and shoes can define who you are or spell a social death. But I didn't see it today--didn't see those girls who didn't quite fit in. For starters, none of them had glasses, they all had long , pretty hair, none of them were really overweight.

I realize this means that I'm old and out of touch. Which makes me sad, because I'll be even older and more out of touch when the monkey is subjected to 8th grade.

But I digress. The proof that the mean girls were in there, somewhere, in the crowd: After Mass, they did a "preview" of the Christmas show. Who got up? The 8th grade girls chorus. The song? "Jingle Bell Rock", with choreography. Oh yes--the Mean Girls are alive and well.....and as usual, the adults really can't see them.